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+--- Thread: A Much Needed Service (/showthread.php?tid=4390)
A Much Needed Service - Carrion - 10-23-2017
Dear citizens of our fair town,
Over the past few months I have heard of some truly abysmal deals. Some startlingly poor ones. Some woefully, terrifyingly bad decisions.
I understand that some people are hasty in their desperation, and that even more are unused to considering every single word said and written. To say nothing of those of you who cannot read.
For this reason, I am now offering my services as mediator. I have been trained by the best this town has ever seen, and I have matched wits with both the infernal and fae.
I do not judge, I do not overcharge, and I am the picture of discretion. I will not be a neutral third party witness, but your advocate. You are free to disregard whatever advice I give, but I will do everything in my power to aid you.
- Sindrian "Carrion" Indridason, Mediator and Confidant
RE: A Much Needed Service - Promises - 10-23-2017
I'll perform whatever services Carrion offers for free in the hopes of avoiding another demonic ascension in Ralinwood.
If you need to check someone for Wytchcraft third nipples, please make them take off their boots, and socks.
Some people even prefer to have sex with their socks on.
I offer as my credentials that I knew almost every secret of old Ralinwood. But sometimes I forget things.
Also that guy follows Dietremen which means he shouts his secrets at the moon sometimes.
Sincerely,
Sevatar Loken.
RE: A Much Needed Service - Carrion - 10-23-2017
I do not encourage dealing with demons. To do so would be unlawful and immoral. I simply know that people are often tempted, and I wish them to have the least devastating outcome. My services involve contract negotiation with immortal and mortal beings alike. Some of you have terrible employment agreements.
And as far as the moon thing goes, a secret offered to my god can never be shared with another being. They are not shouted, they are buried for all time.
But by all means. Your options are Sevatar or the apprentice of the woman who outsmarted him.
- Carrion
RE: A Much Needed Service - Stefan - 10-23-2017
I'll perform whatever services these two do not. I'm pretty good with the shankety shank, and sometimes I eat curses till they disappear. The power of the Ancestors filters through their favorite son to help you.
Also I charge in rose petals and perhaps candlelit dinner. Stefan is up for negotiations.
Penned for:
Stefan Fiodor Bordello, Gate Slayer, Knife Singer, Curse Eater
Man of Purple Palace
Purveyor of Pillow Wisdom
Ancestor's Favorite Son
RE: A Much Needed Service - Promises - 10-23-2017
I am willing to work with Stefan but not Carrion.
Sincerely,
Sevatar
RE: A Much Needed Service - Ostrozne - 10-23-2017
It is an alarming fact indeed that there are so many people eager to gain power that a mediator to the foul demonic forces is needed. More alarming that the need is so great that it occurs in public, in the eyes of the Citadel.
RE: A Much Needed Service - Stefan - 10-23-2017
Stefan wishes to clarify that his services are strictly of mundane nature, with the addition of destroying your evil, evil curses. I am not a good cook, so I cannot offer that.
Penned for:
Stefan
RE: A Much Needed Service - Promises - 10-23-2017
Perhaps we should ask the law here to consider putting restrictions on the kinds of deals that are possible.
Seeing as how Lilith wot became a high lady of hell and all.
RE: A Much Needed Service - Carrion - 10-23-2017
I'm sure no one in this town would be foolish enough to follow a similar path. My mention of demons was purely an example of what challenges I count as successes. An extreme to make a point. These days we're more often overrun with the fae anyway.
So once again, instate that my services are for contracts in general.
I know that I look very ominous and crafty, but giving me the benefit of the doubt has never killed anyone.
- Carrion